Too Many Video Games

I taught my fifth grade students about various monsters today. At one point, I asked, "How do you kill a zombie?" One tiny boy, who I had literally never even heard speak before put up his hand. Shocked, I called on him. In a perfectly calm voice he responded, "Head shot."

Playing It Cool

It seems like everyone I know is going on dates, so the conversations I've been having of late have widely been of the "What the hell does this mean?" and "Is it too soon to reply?" and "God, how damn hard is it to orchestrate a simple kiss in this country where old ladies hiss at you for PDA?" I feel like I'm back in high school again, with all the positives and negatives that come along with that. Basically, it boils down to what I've come to refer to as "fear of crazy."

I hate that you're not allowed to be excited about people. You meet someone cool, but society dictates that you have to pretend to be almost bored about them, otherwise you seem like a stalker. What bull. For all you know, the other person is equally excited and equally frustrated by this nonsense game.

Seriously, when did people become such commitment-phobes that "Hey, wanna meet up again?" now apparently means "Hey, wanna get married and have dozens of babies together?" Just get together and make out! Why does it have to be so hard?

Other than the old ladies, of course. They are pretty scary.

(I put 10:1 odds on my dad commenting "NO MAKING OUT!")

Missing

I miss Lyla.

I miss her the way people seem to miss their significant other when they are separated for a long period of time. I feel like I've lost a tangible part of myself. An arm. At least a thumb. I feel the little phantom pangs where that part of me used to be. I try not to itch them because then sometimes I cry, random and ugly, on a street corner or in my office. The tears well up hot hot behind my eyes without warning. Damn it.

It can't be healthy to be this attached to one's best friend. 

I seriously enjoy television less without her. I get bitter over the fact that I have to choose one thing off the menu, because my person who invariably is torn over the same two items as I am is missing. Going out is not as much fun, and hangovers hurt worse when I can't whine to her and hide from the sun together. I bake less, because I have to eat it all myself. Nobody gives me high-fives for using amazing vocabulary, fangirls out with me, or listens to my hyper-analysis, so I find myself less esoteric.

Worst of all, I don't have anyone to call me on my bullshit. It's not often that you find someone who well and truly makes you a better person. I'm afraid of worsening.

Sea Squirt

I have been hearing of a creature called a "sea squirt" that was showing up in my waygook friends' lunches. This creature was reviled as disgusting, awful, and even inedible. I scoffed. How could a sea creature be THAT bad? Particularly in a soup, as it was apparently usually served?

Today, I was happily eating my squid soup (while letting my thoughts drift to adorable smiles brought about by the mention of Miguel de Unamuno... not fair) when my mouth was suddenly drenched in a sour, acidic, soapy taste. It was so sudden and repulsive that my entire upper half convulsed, if only slightly. I was sitting at table with my principal, after all. My teeth were gripping a small piece of something rubbery and hard. As surreptitiously as I could, I took that thing out of my mouth. I immediately filled my mouth with kimchi and a pepper. Anything to get rid of that taste.

This is what was waiting on my tray. Except they were even more horrible looking: somewhat gray and more knotted.

I had fallen victim to the sea squirt.

Daejeon is Pretty

I spent high school in New Mexico, gaping at sunsets that turned the whole world shades of pink and purple and night skies that featured the dull glow of the milky way tracing its way across the sky behind millions of tiny tiny stars.

I studied in Salamanca, a town dripping with history, paved with ancient cobbles. The whole city is built of sandstone, glowing a warm gold under the sun and the sodium lights that illuminate the city at night. I'd cross the old town wall, walk down to the river, and turn around to gape at the magnificent city rising above me, reflected perfectly in the still waters of the River Tormes, in the place where fiction began.

I moved to Budapest and burst into tears the first time I saw the Parlament. I wandered cemeteries full of tombstones larger than most homes and more ornate than many churches. I felt the wind that had traveled down the Duna to brush my cheeks as I traipsed happily across suspension bridges to sit in dark, sexy gardens and drink bitter herb liqueurs. I traced the patterns in tile roofs with my eyes and never grew tired of the curved lines and bright colors.

Then I moved to Daejeon, a city of neon lights and new, square, beige buildings. I liked it straight off, but I was not sure if it was beautiful. Interesting, dynamic, exciting? Of course. But beautiful? I had my doubts.

I found the river. I found the parks. I found the mountains. I discovered that small children and shop assistants smile at me wherever I go. I bought a bicycle and went for runs at dusk. The cold weather came, and with it new colors and scents.

Daejeon's beauty is growing on me. I'd even go so far as to call it pretty.

Cute Moose + ESL = WIN

I don't know if anyone reading this teaches, particularly younger kids. But if you do, check out Maple Leaf Learning's Youtube channel. It features many videos featuring popular ELL-friendly topics, often including several on a particular grammar point or idea. There are many for all the popular holidays as well. They are clearly articulated and include catchy songs. Best of all, they feature candy-colored backgrounds and adorable cartoons and puppets.

The star is a moose puppet called Marty who has all sorts of mishaps. I love him.

East vs. West

Adjusting to a new job is hard. Adjusting to a new country is hard. Adjusting to an entirely different cultural viewpoint and mindset is really, really, really hard.

You can google the differences between Eastern and Western frames of reference and get a general understanding of what I'm talking about. (This is a pretty good link. Or if you want a slightly longer read, click here.) Basically, it's entirely different. And sometimes it's incredibly frustrating.

For example, when students are being scolded here, they look down to show respect. If they're really sorry, they will smile to try to appease the scolder. And while my mind understands that, the rest of me is shouting, "Look me in the eye, damn it! Stop smiling, I'm mad at you!" because it just feels so disrespectful to me. So I have to take a deep breath and walk away, because otherwise I'll be unreasonable.

Expressiveness in voice and facial expression can be seen as either demonstrative of low intelligence or aggressive. Directness is seen as an insult. So that's fun. I think I scare my coteachers sometimes. And again, the brain understands it, and I try really hard to speak obliquely and in the softest voice I own. But then I feel as if I've robbed myself of my own voice, and that makes me cranky. And I do the wrong thing all the time, because I don't understand that their facial expression when telling me to do something actually means I should do the exact opposite, or whatever.

It just seems to me that society here is breeding a group of incredibly meek individuals, who then hit the magic age of 55 or so and become incredibly bossy, because they are now the "high" ones or whatever. Obviously, it's working for these economic powerhouses. Obviously, they're doing something right. It's just sort of hard to wrap one's mind around here on the ground.

Reaping

Last week, my school had a rice festival. The children have been growing rice in pots, and the time finally came to harvest it. Sure enough, they went through each step in the harvesting process, though I doubt that any of the rice was actually consumed in the end for sanitary reasons. There were also snacks and music going on, so it was a fun way to spend the morning for sure.

Step one: cut rice. Each child receives a handful.

Step two: comb rice through metal rakes to remove much of the rice from the stalk.

Step three: the threshing machine removes any stubborn rice still clinging to the stalk. It is powered with a step-pedal and has metal hooks on it. The rice bunches are gently hit onto it while it spins.

rice in the husk

Step four: the rice is pounded in this large mortar-and-pestle setup to remove the husks from the grain.

Step five: the rice is sifted carefully so that the husks fly away.

Step six: the stalks are twisted and braided into rope for various purposes (in this case, a souvenir for the kiddos).

Step seven (not pictured): the rice is taken to the mill and ground into flour. Obviously, this step didn't actually happen at the school.

Step eight: the rice flour is mixed with water and pounded with heavy mallets for ages and ages to break it down and make it sticky.

So excited

I just get the feeling that Halloween in Korea is going to be pretty intense. And I'm super psyched about it!

Sunday Post!

I didn't blog on Friday, as I was exhausted. So I figure I owe everyone an extra post.

After work on Friday, I ran some errands. I went to the HomePlus, where I hit up Uniqlo and bought two nice button-down shirts, and the super market, where I bought a blankie and coffee-making accouterments. Then I came home, relaxed, watched TV, and went to bed early. Saturday I went to the Daejeombie Charity 5K, featuring zombies. It was awesome, if a bit more low-key than I expected. I then grabbed blowfish soup with Jason, Bola, and Amanda E before checking out a fancy cupcake place. Sunday was a day of rest. I cooked some pretty awesome paprikas csirke, went on a long bike ride, and met a new language exchange partner.

It was a chill weekend, but a good one. It was nice to actually be in Daejeon, see friends, and relax for the first time in a month!

Dog Cafe

Last week I went to a dog cafe. Now, I know that you know that I'm in Korea, so before you panic, a dog cafe has nothing to do with eating dogs. I would never go to a dog restaurant! A dog cafe is pretty much the exact opposite. You go to a cafe and pay a flat fee, in this case 6000 won (about 6 USD or 1200 HUF). You get a (really crappy) coffee for that money, but more importantly, you get to play with all the puppies that live at the cafe! Sometimes you pay by the hour and sometimes you can stay longer. I'm not sure what the policy was at the place we went to; we were the only people there until the very end of our visit, and we stayed just under an hour, so we didn't really find out.

So you get there and the dogs get super duper excited, barking and just generally freaking out at the concept of new people. Not in a bad way, but in a pumped up way. This cafe had two pens, a large one in the center with many dogs in it, and a smaller one off to the side. I went into the larger pen first. There were four or five fluffy white dogs, two chihuahuas, two mini schnauzers, a brown poodle, a long-haired chihuahua, and a strange tiny white dog. The brown poodle was definitely in it to win it, and got all up on us right away. He and one of the white dogs were really excited to play and chase the toy. Most of the other ones just wanted to be pet, and a few sort of slept as if bored by our presence.

The smaller pen had a golden, who was young and rather skinny, a few pomeranians, a white poodle that never left its pillow, and a few quarantines. One of them was getting over a cold, and the other was a mom with new puppies.

This chihuahua really wanted love, but didn't seek it out. She just sort of chilled on the chair until I picked her up and put her on my lap so I could sit down. She gave pretty good derp face.

"Yessss, I have the toy."

The poodle really wanted to chase the toy, and one of the white dogs really liked to chase the poodle chasing the toy while they both barked excitedly. It reminded me of Otto and Mia.

"ZZZZzzzzzz"

"Hi! Pet my belly!"

Whenever we went over to the other pen, or anything happened outside of their line of sight, these ones were totally on it to see what was going on.

Chilling on the chair with the poodle and a serious-faced schnauzer.

Overall, it was a really nice place. There were drink glasses on lots of the tables, so I can tell that the place is frequented and the animals do get a lot of love. It was quite clean, and the animals were all sweet and friendly. None of them were shy or scared. That being said, it did make me a bit sad. The doggies in the big pen didn't really have beds or houses, beyond the few chairs. There was also only one toy for all those dogs! It's hard, sometimes, to see how pets (often) aren't held in the same esteem here. They're definitely pets, not family members, though there are exceptions. I also wonder if the dogs are sad to not have a "person" and if they get lonely at night or get walks or whatever.

Still, I was glad to have gone and I'm sure I'll go back the next time I'm really in need of some puppy hugs!

Droopy

My school had a rice harvesting contest this morning. It was super cute.

Still, though, I'm just sort of droopy. I have a miserable cold that I just can't shake. I feel sort of cranky. I miss people and places a lot.

Sometimes I wonder why I live my life this way. Usually I am very certain, and I am happy with and even proud of my weird nomadic ways. I don't mind being alone, because I like myself and I get to spend my life having amazing adventures. Other days, though, I wonder what my life would have been like if I had settled down. I'm sure I'll settle down someday, and what will that life be like?

We all feel lonely and weird from time to time. It just happens that when I do, right now, there is literally nobody I can talk to, because everyone who might care is asleep.

Today's Big Accomplishment

I made these today. They are magnetic and laminated, one for each of the activities each chapter. Since I'm starting a new policy of mixing stuff up rather than doing the same things in the same order week after week, I thought they would come in handy. Now we can do the same things in different orders! Seriously, though, just being able to blend activities in a more logical and organic fashion will make a huge difference!

Deskwarming, usually

Forgive me for not posting yesterday; I will make up for it with a double post today during my lifetime of deskwarming.

What's that, you ask? Well, in Korea, you are expected to work (if you are a primary school teacher like me) from 8:30 to 16:30, regardless of whether you actually have anything to do during that time. You get about a half hour for lunch, but otherwise you are either teaching or sitting at your desk keeping it warm.

So normally I come into work at 8:30. I drop my stuff off in my office and then go to open up the English room, which entails opening the windows, re-situating the desks, booting up the computer, and so on. I prep the classroom for my lesson and write the day's agenda on the board. Then I go back to the office and look through my lesson plans for the day again.

I teach from 9 until 12:10. This is four lessons, ostensibly with a ten minute break between each of them, though this break is usually absorbed by students leaving late after being forced to stay to actually do their darn class work, and students arriving early because their homeroom teacher can't get rid of them fast enough. Then I close up the classroom and go back to the office where I kill a few minutes before lunch at approximately 12:30. Tuesdays and Thursdays I have one more class in the afternoon, from 13:10-13:50.

So, MWF I am free, but at work, from 13:00 until 16:30. TTh it is one half hour less, with me getting back to the office at 14:00. So those fifteen and a half hours a week in the afternoons are deskwarming time.

I use them to plan my lessons, make supplemental materials, and so on. Now, the problem is that my school is pretty slavish about using the state-mandated curriculum and adhering to the book for everything. It's hard to get my coteachers to agree to modify the curriculum in any way. So planning for my four lessons a week doesn't actually take that much time, since it mainly involves reading the lesson plan and maybe choosing how to tweak one or two exercises. I also have camp to plan for, but that is such a massive undertaking that I've only started scratching the surface thus far. The plans aren't due for another month, anyway.

So, what do I do with my time? Well, I try to use some of it wisely. I study a bit of Korean every day and, for awhile, I worked on my online training, which is now complete. I read some articles and visit some teaching websites. But I also waste tons of time. I check facebook slavishly. I write most of my blogs at work. I read articles on octopus intelligence and rat beauty contests. I read novels on my computer. I stare at my planner. I take the long walk to the water cooler.

The hours of deskwarming, though, don't even hold a candle to the times when it happens for days.

KTX

The KTX high speed train is a thing of beauty. It flies across the peninsula, taking me from Daejeon to Seoul in only 51 minutes, and for only 23.000 won. Best of all, it's clean and smooth. You can't tell how much you are zipping along. There might be a slight shake, and there is a bit of a hum. Certainly nothing to give away that you are traveling at 305 km per hour! (190 mph)

Except for every so often, another train passes going the other way, and there is a shriek and a shake. That's pretty intense.

No Blog

No blog post today. Sorry folks. I'm tired and worn down. So I'll just leave you with these tigers. Which one do I feel like right now?

Okonomiyaki

This traditional Japanese snack is basically an omelet, filled with bits of meat (cuttlefish in my case) and vegetables, then topped with barbeque sauce and mayo, plus shaved pork. It's very popular.

I didn't love it. I'm sure this is mainly due to my preference that my eggs be cooked to death. The taste was ok, but the sauce was too sweet. And I think it was the culprit of my tummy sadness a few hours later. I'm still glad I tried it, though!

Truck birds

Every Tuesday on my way home from work, a delivery van is parked outside the GS nonstop. These little birds are always sitting on the dash, just chilling, doing bird things. It's the small things.

Stupid

Apparently my neighbor had a raucous party over the weekend. So now the rest of my building is angry at the American. Because of course it was me.

Blargh. For serious. I am so cranky right now.

Sky Garden

Is there anything more beautiful than a city from above, all lit up at night? I know some people will say that waterfalls or sunsets are more beautiful, or babies, or whatever. And those things certainly hold their own charms. To me, though, a city is a tremendous thing: so many people living and working together. So many lives woven into other lives through small or large connections and actions. All the incredible force of mankind to overcome our solitary natures and form a unit.

From above, it all looks perfect. Seamless and flowing. I really don't think there is anything more beautiful.

The Giraffe

After a full day of sightseeing, I popped into the Osaka Zoo on the way back to my hostel. It was only an hour from closing, but the entrance fee was only 500 yen. It was a nice enough zoo by non-American standards. Not a torture zoo, but the cages were a bit small and some animals were all alone. Zoos always make me a little bit sad for the animals. I know that they do great work for saving animals and educating the public, but it is still hard to see some animals caged up far from their natural habitat or climate.

I made it to the giraffe enclosure right as they were ambling into their night-time area. Seeing I was too late, I made a disappointed noise. One of the giraffes spun around, loped over to me, dropped its head, and stared me straight in the eye for a second. I swear to God. I know it was a giraffe, but I could feel it looking at me and regarding me. I burst into tears because I was so overwhelmed by that brief feeling of pure connection. It turned around and went inside. I stood there, thankful no other zoo visitors were in my little corner.

I think that maybe I'm starting to get old. Sometimes the world makes me so sad. How long before there is no more nature, and will the zoo giraffes know?

I know this is a weird entry. I apologise. I did have a fantastic day of sightseeing, which I will blog about in detail with pictures. Now for a quick rest before heading to the sky building...

Going to Japan

0430 Wake up. Check phone obsessively. Fall back asleep.

0600 Wake up. Shower and wash hair. Throw towels into washing machine. Go back to bed.

0700 Snooze alarm.

0720 Actually get up. Pack a bag. Regret last night's beers.

0840 Ahhhh running late. Where is toothbrush case? What style outlet does Japan use. Eff it, toss converter into duffel.

0850. Coat. Out. Kimbap and coke zero from the nonstop. Bus.

0925 Arrive bus station. Successfully obtain paper copy of ticket previously purchased online. Feel like a winner. Wander around.

1008 The airport bus is three minutes late and the natives are growing restless.

1012 Board bus. It's called the airport limousine and it has plush seats with leg rests and lumbar support. Pretty awesome for 24 bucks.

1130 Wake up. Realize neck pillow is in my duffel under the bus. Boo.

1200 Rest stop. Get really excited about there being liquid soap in the bathroom. Get back to the bus to discover that all the women left their purses unsupervised on a bus with its door wide open. Korea, man.

1209 Am 99% sure that I am back on the correct bus.

1300 Arrive to the airport. Read a bit.

1400 Check in. Security and passport control. Many knowing smiles and comments of , "English teacher?" Ride the swanky shuttle to my terminal.

1500 Dokk for lunch. Yum.

1545 Flight still not boarding. Break down and spend five bucks on an orange mocha frappuccino esque drink.

1600 Boarding time pushed back to the oddly specific 1628. The natives, again, grow restless.

1629 Boarding begins.

1640 In my seat. Yay for efficiency! Off to country number 37!

Ingenious

This bar has icy cupholders built right into the table. Brilliant!

(Apparently this did not publish last night. Silly app!)

Mosquitoes

I am writing this post as a warning to myself and others. Beware the mosquitoes in Korea. They will destroy you. Sit outside for ten minutes on a warm evening after a rain, and they will ravage your skin. You will look like a plague victim and suffer for days.