Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Sick of Being Sick

I have been generally sort of under the weather for a few weeks now. I had bacterial conjunctivitis for a few days. Then I ran a fever. Then I spent some time with stomach issues before it cycled back around to my sinuses. Now it's in my throat and lungs. My lungs burn and I just left the office to be sick. I feel dizzy and nauseated.

I've been to tons of doctors and they all say the same thing: you have a cold.

I don't know. I don't feel all that awful, generally, and it definitely comes in fits and starts. But I'm just worn out on it, you know? I want to feel healthy for more than twelve hours at a time. I want to be able to walk briskly and dart up the stairs without getting a head rush or a coughing fit. And if I must be sick, I want to be able to wallow in it: stay home, rest, drink soup, and heal.

But instead I come into work every day in order to sit here and sniffle and cough. I teach five classes in a row with a little squeaky bark voice. I fall asleep on my desk during the afternoons. I visibly repel the people around me, and I don't blame them, either.

I'm just so tired.

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